Showing posts with label Dating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dating. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Let love ... out?

In honor of Valentine's Day, and for the Bloggers Like Me Blog Hop, I'm reviving two personal posts I wrote about letting love in ... and out

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A while ago, I wrote about how I let love in.  A reader asked me to speak more about how I was able to do this.  And honestly, a key part of letting love in is...letting love OUTFalse love... that is.


Last week in my "Theories of Counseling" class, we covered Existential Theory, which focuses on themes in our lives.  One of those themes is "loving".  To practice our counseling skills, we do roleplays with partners in class.  For the roleplay to be effective, you have to use your own experiences.  I went back to the time when I let my ex's false love OUT and my (now) husband's love IN. I could remember my exact feelings, every rationalization, and every excuse. I remembered how when it was over, I kept referring back to how it USED to be.  And honestly, I developed an image of him that was far better than the person he truly was. (A false self...as my class partner called it.)



Last weekend, I watched " Ghosts of Girlfriend's Past". It wasn't a good movie. It wasn't particularly funny. But there was one quote that stuck with me.

 "The person who cares less has the power in the relationship."

If you want to know how to let love out or if you want to know if you are in a healthy relationship...then refer to this quote.  If you are in a relationship where your significant other "cares less" or holds all the "power" a.k.a. one-sided, then walk away.  That is NOT love.  No relationship is ever perfect. Everyone has problems. Obstacles will arise.  But the key to a lasting relationship, is a DEEP mutual love and affection for eachother. Period. 

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