Vintage Post: How I Straighten My Hair

DISCLAIMER: Please note that you must be careful when you straighten your hair.  To avoid heat damage, pay attention to how YOUR hair reacts to heat. Always use a heat protectant.  Try lower heat first then work your way up to determine the optimum heat temperature.  Also make sure that you don't use a blow dryer that is more than 1875 watts.  Abuse of any hairstyle, whether it is heat styling, wigs, weaves, braids, wash and gos, or headbands can be damaging.  So pay attention to your hair. Adjust your routine when you notice signs of damage.

TIPS:
- I am a big advocate of tourmaline ionic heat styling tools.  The negative ions smooth the hair cuticle, dries your hair faster, locks in moisture, and reduces heat damage. I have been using tourmaline ionic blow dryers and flat irons for almost two years. I switched to a tourmaline ionic blow dryer after I fried off my hair with a faulty blow dryer. My hair grew back in 10 months. My hair dresser was surprised by my lack of split ends.
-Use a HEAT PROTECTANT!  Whether it is grapeseed oil, CHI silk infusion, or IC Straightening Serum (my product of choice), please protect your tresses.
-Don't run the flat iron over your hair 50-million times.  Once or twice should be suffice.

PRODUCTS USED:
Avalon Organics Peppermint Oil Shampoo
Organic Root Stimulator Replenishing Conditioner
Aphogee Protein Leave-in Conditioner
Giovanni Direct Leave-In Conditioner
African Royale Hot Six Oil
IC Straightening Serum
Isoplus Contitioning Gel (when I curled hair the next day)
Andis Professional Tourmaline Ionic Blow Dryer (only about $40)
Titanium Tools Flat Iron
Revlon Ceramic Curling Iron

STEPS:

-Wash, deep condition, and detangle hair.  Put in your leave-in conditioners and oils.

-Put a reasonable amount of heat protectant in your hand, rub together hands, and apply.  Blow-dry detangled hair.  I use a blow-dryer comb attachment.  Before I blow dry each section, I use my shower comb to detangle again.

I originally blow dried my hair to braid cornrowed extensions. Fail!  I need to put in kinky twists.  But check out my little twists. I'm going ot have the cutest twist-out when I grow some hair.

Flat iron hair in small sections.  For each section, only use heat protectant spanning about a centimeter. If it is not getting straight enough, divide your hair into slightly smaller sections.  (Rather than run the flat iron on your hair too many times.)

If I were going out, I would immediately curl my hair. Since I was going to bed, I wrapped my hair. The next morning I curled it.

To maintain my hairstyle:

-Avoid water-based hair products, otherwise it will revert.  I used oil and shea butter to seal in the moisture and maintain my hair style.

-Resist the urge to flat iron mid-week.  If your hair starts to revert, work with it.  Consider pin-curls, a braid out, or putting in rollers.

-Avoid really hot showers; they are not good for your skin anyway.  When you take a shower, consider using multiple hair wraps and shower cap. 

Anyone else have any advice?

Vintage Post: Your hair looks professional like that...

Please excuse the picture quality. I took this pic with my cell phone.

Let's rewind to yesterday.  I straightened my hair for my hubby's birthday.  I was very excited to see the amount of growth in just two-week's time.  (I'm doing something right.)  But of course, 15 minutes away from a much needed vacation, someone had to spoil my day.  (No, I'm not going anywhere.  Just not to work....ahhhh.)

A co-worker, who normally barely says two words to me, stated, "Your hair looks nice!"

Surprised. I replied, "Thank you".

My thank you barely had the time to make it out of  my lips, before the interjection, "It looks professional like that."

Pause.

As opposed to what? My natural texture?  Am I overreacting?  And who are you to tell me what is professional?  You are wearing a hawaiian shirt and wrinkled shorts.  [At least that is what I think this non-descript person was wearing.]  Who made you the authority on professionalism?

So, fifteen minutes away from my vacation, I simply walked into my office and started to pack up my stuff.  I was on the brink of a serious ABW (Angry Black Woman) moment.  I  normally get compliments in my office on my hair [whether it is curly or straight], my clothes [which are professional, even during the business casual summer], and my shoes [always fabulous, but still working within the confines of a professional setting].  So I wasn't thrown back by the compliment.  After attending a predominantly white university, I've been subject to blatant racism [cue swastikas and the "N" word written on all doors...on my first night of college] and ignorant comments [cue, terminology like "ghetto booty"].  So, by the age of 28, I'm not sensitive about race. I normally correct people and move on. 

After some thought, I came to the conclusion that I wasn't overracting. This person just game me an underhanded "compliment".  And by the time I got home I was fuming. Luckily, a birthday dinner with my hubby, mom, and sis calmed me down.  But I'm still a little peeved.  

Should I be so angry? Your thoughts?

Vintage Post: Hair Reversion

My hair after my co-wash and before bentonite clay. I co-washed, because bentonite clay and apple cider vinegar clarify the hair.In my third installment, check out the before and after.  (Make note of my different curl textures and shrinkage.)

It's no secret. I straighten my hair.  I'm aware of the dangers, but hair is an accessory to me. I take caution and I don't overdo it.  I've been checking out a lot of YouTube videos about straightening hair, heat damage, and I realized that there are quite a few things I'm doing right:

• At night, I use coconut oil to do pin curls or wrap my hair. Coconut oil lays the cuticles down and results in a nice, smooth finish.  (Much better option than running the flat iron through your hair again. I only do that in emergency situations.)
• I pre-poo with coconut oil -- either overnight or 20-30 minutes prior to shampooing hair.  Last week, I also put some castor oil on my scalp.  Castor oil promotes healthy hair growth, but it is a heavy oil so DON'T rub through your hair.
• I deep condition my hair.  Based upon some videos I've watched, moisture is key to silky, bouncy hair...without the temptation to put too much heat on your hair.
• I don't put heat on my hair that is over 350 degrees.  Otherwise, you may end up with heat damage or alter your curl pattern.  (When I accidentally ran the flat iron through a small section at 400 degrees, I defintely changed the curl pattern. I've been nursing.  I plan on growing it out and cutting it off. LESSON LEARNED.)
• I revert my hair by running water on hair and rubbing my scalp in circles.  My curls revert in this step alone. If any curls look different,  I focus on those areas during the shampoo and condition process
• I clarify my hair after a week of straight hair. I use a lot of cones in my hair, while it is straight.  I make sure I get them out of my hair.
• I exercise caution.  Whether you use heat, color, or relaxer...exercise caution.

Here are some helpful videos I found:





And this video...

I personally don't follow any instructionals to the letter. I incorporate elements that work for me. 

Does anyone else have any tips, suggestions, or cautions?

Vintage Post: Bentonite Clay &Twist-out

If you can recall, I originally wanted to try a henna treatment.  But I recently learned that there are alternatives to henna, with similar results.  After much deliberation, I recognized that a messy, all-day henna treatment was probably not a sustainable hair treatment for an expectant mother.

Benefits of Bentonite Clay:

• Removes dirt, debri, and buildup from hair; draws excess oils to the surface (also great for skin)
• Defines/Enhances curl pattern
• Imparts shine
• Improves detangling
• Nutrients nourish hair
• Mineral Content:
• Silica- 61.4%
• Aluminum- 18.1%
• Iron- 3.5%
• Sodium- 2.3%
• Magnesium- 1.7%
• Calcium- 0.04%
• Titanium- 0.02%
• Potassium- 0.01%
• Moisture- 7.8%
• pH - 8.3 - 9.1   (I mixed it with Apple Cider Vineger, which should bring down the ph.  Hair products should have a ph of 5.5 -7. But I'm not kimmaytube. I don't test the ph of my products.  So don't take my word for it.)

Tips:

• Don't use metal utensils (It draws impurities from metals; the warning is located on the container)
• It should be gray
• Can be purchased from health food stores like Whole Foods, Trader Joes, and Vitamin Shoppe. (I purchased mine at Vitamin Shoppe)
• Be careful trying to open container in store to check the color....you may end up with powder all over your black coat like I did.
• Don't let it harden on your hair!  Leave in for 20-30 minutes. If you forget about it and leave it in longer, have fun taking it out. Don't worry. I only left it in for 25 minutes.

This is my hair after reverting and co-washing my hair.

I guesstimated a mixture of bentonite clay and apple cider vinegar.  The result should be a yogurt consistency.  Some people use water, oils and/or conditioners in their mix. I decided to keep it simple.

Clay on my hair. How flattering...

Rinsed out and Conditioned.

Flat twists in the front, regular two-strand twists in the back.  Flat twisting gives me pregnancy carpal tunnel.  So no more flat twists until I pop this baby out.

Twist-out results the next day.

Favorite twist-out products:

1. Shea moisture

2. Coconut oil, shea butter, aloe vera gel

3. Bee Mine Curly Butter

*Always seal ends with shea butter

*Thus far, I am pleased with the results.  All of the stated benefits were achieved.  I'm sold :-) I plan on doing this treatment once a month. I will keep you updated on the long-term results.

Need a video tutorial?

Check out BlackOnyx.

Has anyone else tried bentonite clay? What did you think?  Does anyone else have any henna alternatives?

Vintage Post: Lessons Learned - 2.5 Weeks Natural

On the right, my hair when I'm too lazy to do it. I finally decided to do my hair after my husband asked if I could twist my hair or something...lol

All done! I used Bee Mine Hold Curly Butter, which I won on Moptop Maven's blog.

I put on a hat to go vote !

The next day after work...

It's hard to believe, but I've been all natural for almost three weeks!  In these past few weeks, I've learned a lot about not only my hair, but about myself as well: 

• I've learned to not be so sensitive. So when my mom smiled and said I looked like a pickinanny (meaning, pickininny), I wasn't offended. I actually thought it was funny and I was happy that she didn't gawk at my hair all night. (My mom has a tendency to poke, prod, and stare.  Imagine my mom inspecting my face after a break out. Not fun. At all.)
• A lot of my appearance is wrapped up in my hair.  I never realized how much I loved my long, thick hair... until it was gone.  I know I am not my hair, but I am. I am!  Patiently waiting for it to grow back. I will NEVER cut it again.
• Overuse and abuse of oil will result in a breakout.  I can't remember the last time I had a breakout, but last week I tried a mixture of olive oil, coconut oil, and shea butter. Fail! Major fail!  Every time I touched my hair, I would have a handful of oil.  That same oil dripped onto my face and caused a major breakout on my forehead and temples. I immediately stopped using olive oil and attacked the breakout with Salicylic acid (Neutrogena astringent).  My face is clear once again.  Now, I stick to my hot six oil/spray, coconut oil, and shea butter. No more trips to the kitchen for me.
• Wash and Gos are not for me. In my hair, wash and gos resulted in a shrunken, matted mess.  And that's ok. They are just not for me. Instead, I do a flat twist-out and for the next 2-3 days, I use Cantu Shea butter.  I get the same results as a wash and go and it's less time consuming.
• My hair loves water-based products and conditioners.  The key to moisture in my hair is deep conditioning, the use of water-based hair creams, and great leave-in conditioners.  Then seal lightly with oil and shea butter when appropriate. 
• The Denman brush is worth all the hype. At least to me.  I thoroughly detangle first with my shower comb, of course. Running the brush through my hair softens and smooths the texture. It results in great twist-outs.  And it doesn't pull out my hair either...
• I learned to curb my PJIsm. Over the fast months, I would randomly buy products because I heard about it on a blog, or YouTube.  I've curbed that habit. Instead, I'm focusing on how to use those products and particular techniques.  I hate Cantu Shea Butter as a leave-in. It has been in my cabinet for months. But on YouTube, someone mentioned that it is a great alternative for wash and gos. So I tried it and it worked.  Try looking up how others use the products you already have.  Also, look up techniques.  Don't be so quick to run to the store. Take the time to learn more about your hair, develop a routine, and figure out what is missing.  The only products I am really interested in purchasing are Shea Moisture (as an alternative to Cantu Shea Butter since it flakes and I'm not fond of the smell), and Aloe Vera Gel (my Bee Mine product has Shea and Aloe Vera Gel. Love it!)
• DO ME! No matter what someone suggests on a blog, forum or on YouTube, I have to DO ME! I have to take the time to learn my hair and what works for me. Some disapprove of cones, my hair has no problem with them.  Some don't believe in washing hair, I do.  Some disapprove of straightening natural hair, but I like the versatility.  It's my hair so I'm going to DO ME!

What lessons have you learned on your hair journey? (Whether it is a natural or healthy hair journey)

Ten Dumbest Things I've Ever Done to My Hair (a.k.a. Ten Reasons I'm Lucky To Still Have Hair)

I've said it before.  My hair is resilient.  The other day, I thought back to all the horrible things I've done to my hair and realized... I am REALLY lucky to still have hair.  Seriously!  I should be bald.  Or at least have bald spots or thin hair.  But despite my abuse, my hair is still as thick and luscious as it was prior to the abuse.  So that you can learn from my hair mistakes, get a good laugh, and in some cases stop worrying so much about damaging your hair (permanently)...I present the TEN DUMBEST THINGS I'VE DONE TO MY HAIR.

#1  Let's start with the obvious. Shall we?  (Points above.) Last week, I decided to straighten my hair.  I learned about the chasing method and I just had to see how long my hair had grown. So I pulled out my blow dryer and flat iron. Now my mistake was not straightening my hair. 99% of my hair reverted to its original curl. But there is one piece who's curl is not as tight as it should be. You see....when I first turned on my flat iron, it was set to 400 degrees. When I noticed, I turned it down to 350 degrees. I walked away for about a minute. But I was impatient, passed it through my hair and realized it was still too hot.  LESSON LEARNED: Don't be impatient when detangling or styling your hair with heat.  If you do some damage, bring out the protein and deep conditioners.  (It should be fine though. I won't lose any sleep over it.)

#2 Number two has nothing to do with me --at least not directly.  (But you'll understand why this makes number 2 later.) While my mom had a relaxer in her hair, she decided to answer the phone. She chatted for who knows how long.  When she finally washed it out, her hair came out in clumps.  And I let my mother put a relaxer in my hair, AFTER hearing this story....

#3 When I was a little kid, my mom knew how to style my hair.  Unfortunately, she used old school methods for detangling.  I'll be honest.  My hair was washed (maybe) every two months. And when it was washed, it involved me running away from the comb. My mom was vicious!  Detangling did not involve loads of leave-in conditioners and oils, like today.  We once snapped a blow dryer in half, trying to blow dry my hair.  It is a miracle that my hair still grew despite it all.

#4 When I was a little kid, I loved to unravel the ends of my plaits/braid and play with the ends of my hair.  When I got my first relaxer for my fifth grade graduation, the hairdresser had a hard time getting my ends straight.  She looked at me, and asked, "Did you unravel the ends of your braids?!"  Guilty as charged.  I probably broke off quite a few strands in the process too.

#5 Remember #2?  Here is where it applies.  In junior high, my mom once relaxed my hair so badly that all of my roots were burnt to my scalp.  [Yes, I should be bald right now.]  I went to the school nurse and she looked at my like I had two heads. My solution was to treat the burns with vaseline and slowly pull my hair off my scalp over the course of a few weeks. (Yes, it was painful.)  To add insult to injury, burns were part of the usual ritual.  I got into the habit of searching my head and picking scabs after every relaxer.  My mother and professionals alike burned me religiously until my early 20s.  

#6  Imagine me... Age 12. Summer camp every weekday. Swimming every other day.  Guess who didn't wash her hair when she got out the pool? ME! Guess who's hair turned red and orange? MINE! Guess who's hair broke off on the right side of her head? MINE.  I had to stop relaxing that side of my hair during my eighth grade year. I cornrowed it and  did a side swoop with the rest of my hair.  It was finally long enough for a relaxer by eighth graduation.  LESSONS LEARNED: (1)Don't put relaxers in kids' hair.(2) Don't add trauma to damaged hair. Give it time to rejuvenate.

#7 By sophomore year in college, my hair had grown pretty long...for the first time in my life.  (BSL, maybe.) For seven months, I wore braids and extensions (no relaxer).  Because I was working at Macy's, I decided to utilize my 20% discount at the salon. Bad idea! Not only did she burn me, but she cut my hair!  My BSL hair was cut to my shoulders.   I was so livid, I wanted to cry.  LESSONS LEARNED: Don't be cheap with your hair.

#8 My senior year in college, I did my usual extensions to accommodate my strenuous dance schedule.  When I braided my hair, I decided to try a product that bonded your braids so they wouldn't unravel.  When I took out my braids, my ends were see through (my dad cut off 2-3 inches) and my hair was limp. It dried out my hair!  To make matters worse, I put highlights on my damaged hair.  ( I was stressed out and didn't care at that point.)  It took about two years to fully grow out the damaged hair (including a bang by default).  I didn't wear braids again for two years sans braid bonder.

 Two years later, sans braid bonding nonsense.

My hair two years later-- in grad school.  Check out that big hair!

#9 When I worked in Baltimore, I was desperate to find a hairdresser.  So I looked up a Dominican salon. Ventured to other (bad) side of town.  I couldn't go wrong with a Dominican relaxer and blowout, right? Wrong!  Why? Because in Baltimore they believe in relaxing from root to tip.  Luckily, all of my hair didn't break off.  I stopped wearing relaxers for a while after that.  To add insult to injury, my Dominican salon in Delaware got rude. My usual stylist refused to touch my hair.  The new stylist pulled and tugged at my hair, saying "Duro, duro, malo, malo" as she proceeded to explain to a guy in the shop how she did such thick and bad  hair.  I told her multiple times to stop talking about me, because I understood Spanish.  My hair was burning so badly that I wanted to run over to the sink and wash it out! Sigh.  LESSONS LEARNED: (1) Speak up for yourself in a stylist's chair. (2) Find a stylist you trust, who also appreciates your hair.  My stylist marvels at the thickness of my hair.  (Too bad she doesn't do natural hair...sigh.)

#10 By far, the dumbest thing I've done to my hair... My trusty hair dryer for years started to fall apart (held together with electrical tape) and even started to smoke.  I still used it, telling myself that I need to buy a new one.  Meanwhile, my hair was feeling limp and I couldn't figure out why.  It couldn't be my trusty hair dryer, could it? I've had it for years!  Well, I finally figured out the source. With one pass of the hairdryer, the hair on the back, left side of my head only reached my shoulders.  I stood in the mirror asking, "Where is my hair? What happened?"  A week later, I was at the hairdresser...cutting off the damaged ends only 10 months before my wedding.

Luckily, I thought it was cute.  I loved it so much that I planned to grow it back for the wedding and cut it all off again.  And we all know what happened....hello Rihanna cut and the impetus for me to go natural.  So in the end... one of the worst things I've done to my hair, was one of the best things I could have done.

Ten months later, I had enough hair for a lavish wedding updo.  (Sigh of relief)

Although I've done a lot of of damaging things to my hair, I've obviously done some things rights. Otherwise, I would be bald. So next week, I will follow up with... "TEN BEST THINGS I'VE DONE FOR MY HAIR (AND DIDN'T EVEN KNOW IT")

In the meantime, what are the dumbest things you've done to your hair? Let's discuss.

Vintage Post: Fresh Cut

With no further ado, I present my new haircut.

The First Cut

Getting wrapped to go under the dryer.

Hair is dry!

The finished product! 

I also got my eyebrows threaded for the first time.  My eyebrows have NEVER looked this good.  (Like my hair, most people cringe when they see my eyebrows.  They are thick and curly.) If you live in Delaware and are ever at the Christiana Mall, please check out  "Eyebrow Designer 21".  She graduated from a cart in the mall to a storefront.  You have to respect her hustle and support a small business owner.

Vintage Post: Trial and Error (Additional curl rod tips)

Recently, I did my first hair tutorial on rodding short hair. (It will be featured on curlynikki.com tomorrow!)  In hindsight, I realized that I did not take enough pictures.  To supplement my previous post, I am providing some additional pictures and tips. 

About two weeks ago, at 10:30 at night, I rushed a rod set. Every time a rod fell out, I just replaced it with a curler.  It only took 45 minutes, but the curls were too loose so they only lasted three days. My curls normally last about a week. 

This is how my hair looked the second time around.  I didn't look bad, but I learned my lesson.

After learning my lesson, I took my time this weekend. I first pre-pooed with extra-virgin coconut oil. I left it in for about 30 minutes under my self-heating conditioning cap. I then washed and conditioned my hair as usual.

I first tackled the back and sides of my hair, since they are shorter and more difficult to do. Last time, it took about 2 hours to set my rollers, this time only 1 hour and 15 minutes.  Practice makes perfect.  This time around, I used Organic Root Stimulator Lock & Twist Gel. It helped my short hair stick to the roller and provided great hold.  I also used it to twist the short hairs at the nape of my neck.  I highly recommend moisturizing your hair with shea butter and oil prior to applying the gel when you work on each curl. I didn't. When I took out my curls, they were crispy. To fix the problem, I applied African Royale Hot Six Oil and put on my conditioning cap again. Problem Solved.

I separated each curl into about 4 or more curls. Last time, I said three or more. I lied.  The more you separate the curls, the bigger they will be.  

I hope that provided some further explanation. Please let me know if you have any questions.

Vintage Post: Standards of Beauty

Who defines our standards of beauty?

How often do we (especially us ladies) let those standards define us?

According to the standards of beauty, thin is better than thick; straight hair is better than nappy curly; blonde is better than brunette; lighter skin is better than dark (unless it is a tan); big boobs are better than small boobs, etc. etc. Who came up with this crap and why do we fall for it? It is no wonder that women are susceptible to disorders like depression and bulimia/anorexia!

As I’ve grown older, I’ve discovered my true beauty. Quite honestly, I didn’t think I was beautiful during my teenage years. (Who does?) I was the scrawny girl with buck teeth, a flat chest, and nappy thick hair. It was difficult to see my true beauty when I was constantly chastised for my awkward experience. By college, I blossomed. I fixed my exterior. I gained some weight, straightened my teeth, fell in love with my small but perky boobs, and tamed my thick hair.

As I approach the age of 28, I’m transitioning to setting my own standards of beauty. I don’t want to love myself in spite of my flaws; I want to love myself because of them. Or at least what society deems as flaws. I want to pursue what I see as beautiful.

Guest Post: Love Me So Naturally

  Today's guest post is from "Love me So Naturally". In her post, she explains natural courage.

Naturally Courageous

Learning to embrace our natural beauty can be challenging. Often times we aspire to be what we see. Well, I have decided to challenge myself. In November of  2010, I decided to join many others on the journey to care for and grow my hair in its natural state. After much research, I learned that a lot of the issues I have faced with growing my hair to its optimal length was a due to the harsh chemicals I used to process my hair. What a relief it was to find out that once I changed the way a handled my hair, my hair would change the way it responded to me.

I know that true change can only come from within. So today, I will walk the journey of loving myself from the inside out. I invite you to join me on this journey.

The journey to put the elements of who I truly am back into me….the journey to become "Naturally Courageous".

As a bonus... check out her henna mix!

Since I have decided to go natural I have treated my hair with Henna almost every four to six weeks. Henna is a natural hair dye which provides a wealth of benefits for strong, healthy hair. Henna is great for completely covering gray hair and lasts much longer then other coloring agents. For various results, Henna may be mixed with other natural coloring agents such as Indigo to achieve your desired look.

My Henna Mix:

100g of Body Art Quality Henna
1/2 cup of conditioner of your choice (My Preference: Say Yes to Carrots! or Herbal Essence Hello Hydration)
1/2 cup of Distilled water
2-3 drops of Peppermint Oil
2 Tbsp of Olive Oil

Mix ingredients to a thick paste and apply evenly throughout the hair. (It is not necessary to wash hair prior to application) Cover hair with a plastic cap or saran wrap for at least three hours. Thoroughly rinse hair free of Henna residue, and style hair as normal.

Though Henna is a great benefit for naturals, it also provides the same benefits for chemically treated hair. However, it is important to use body art quality Henna if your hair is chemically treated.

There are some rare cases of people who have had an allergic reaction to Henna. Thus, prior to using this product I would recommend completing a test patch to verify you do not develop any of the following symptoms:
a tight feeling in the chest, sneezing, itchy eyes, runny nose, and dry cough, after exposure to Henna powder or paste.

As with any product, I would recommend that you do extensive research to ensure that the product is right for you.

You can purchase Henna from the following website: http://www.hennaforhair.com/

As always, leave comments, questions, or add suggestions on how you use Henna.

Until next time, Love Me So Naturally!

Vintage Post: A Lesson in Confidence

In the past, I've talked about learning how to my love myself, and knowing my worth,  but my struggle with the concept of the BC has me questioning, "Am I as confident as I think I am?"

Quite frankly, it's easy to be confident about your outward appearance if you meet society's standards of beauty. But what if you don't?  At various points in my life, I've been underweight, had buck teeth, had braces, bad skin, and hair all over the place.  As I got older, I learned to hold my head up high, despite my "malfunction" at the time.  I knew how to feign confidence, even when I looked in the mirror and didn't like what I saw.  But was I truly confident? Or did I only regain my confidence once I corrected that "malfunction". 

 Right now, I think my "fake" TWA is adorable. (I call it fake because of my relaxed ends.) Those same relaxed ends I want to keep for length, are the same relaxed ends that take forever to curl and dry.  I don't mind taking time to do my hair.  The problem is...it's not long enough for a ponytail; and I can't simply wash and go. And THAT is what drives me nuts.  There are days I just want something quick and neat. But to look presentable, my only option is a roller set.  Plus, my natural roots are taking over and they need nurturing (water) that is very different than my relaxed ends. 

After a day of checking out TWA and Big Chop videos, I noticed a recurring theme...Confidence.  I'm beautiful. I just need to make the appointment.  My hair will grow back.  I need to let go of the West Indian concept that "your hair is your beauty". It's not.

I'm about to learn what true confidence is...

I got mad one day and cut off the relaxed ends in the back.

What is your definition of confidence?

10 Best Things I've Done for My Hair (Whether or not I realized it)

ME at the recent blogger meet up . I am waiting to steal some of their high quality DSLR pics. Post coming soon. Thanks To E, Keeley's husband, for taking my picture.

Hair: My first rod set on all-natural hair.

(Differences: Pre- poo with coconut oil; Giovanni Deep moisture shampoo; Aphogee Pro-vitamin leave-in; Sedal Lissage setting lotion)

Top and Sweater: Express

Jeans: American Rag (They still fit thanks to low-rise and stretch!)

Recently I posted about the 10 Dumbest Things I've Ever Done to My Hair.  If you read it, you will realize that I am pretty lucky to still have hair on my head.  But luck is not the only reason I still have hair. Over the years, I've done a few things right.

#1 I wash my hair in warm water (open up the hair shaft), and rinse out conditioner with cold water (to close the hair shaft.)

#2 I ALWAYS deep condition my hair.  Always...  I  often walk around with conditioner in my hair for hours out of pure laziness.

#3 I limit hair manipulation and only comb my hair with a shower comb. (Yes, I did this with a relaxer as well.) 

#4 I never overdo it. When I recognize (or the beginnings of)  hair damage, I give my hair a break.  ( I don't understand why people who suffer from hair tension alopecia continue to wear tight braids and weaves.)

#5 I stretched my relaxers.  Stretching relaxers doesn't work for everyone --depending on the fragility of your hair. But for me, stretching prevented overprocessing and resulted in faster hair growth. The key is to avoid combing at the line of demarcation when your natural hair reverts.

#6 I vary hair styles. Overuse and abuse of any hairstyle will result in breakage. Rotate the use of braids, weaves, ponytails, and loose hairstyles.

#7 Use quality hair products. Self-explanatory...

#8 I listen to my hair.  Immediately following a relaxer, my hair felt too straight to me.  So I used protein conditioners.  When touch-up time approached, I used moisturizing conditioners to soften the hair.  Pay attention and act appropriately. You can usually catch damage before it's too late.

#9  I eat healthy and drink water.  I don't always eat as healthy as I would like, but I can see a major difference in my hair based upon changes in my diet.  Your hair and nails are the last on the list of nourishment.  (Vital organs and functions are more important.)So if you are not taking care of yourself, it will be evident. 

#10 I appreciate the hair on my head.  When you don't, you end up doing way too much crazy experimentation...and you pay the price.

What are the best things you've done for your hair?